Fear Strikes Out – 

May 29, 2020 – He twice had been to drug rehab centers. Once, for three weeks in 2013, when he was pitching for the Phillies. Another time, for three months in 2015, after retirement.

There were signs all along of his addiction, his teammates and Phillies employees say. He didn’t seem himself on some days. He was there physically, but his mind wandered. His eyes were vacant. He tried to tell friends he was OK, just having marital problems and undergoing counseling, but he couldn’t hide his addiction from those close to him.

“Something wasn’t right with him,” said Kyle Kendrick, his former Phillies teammate and close friend. “Just the way he was acting, you could just see something was wrong. I tried to talk to him and felt like he wasn’t there.

“It was just terrible to see.”

The Phillies assistance program tried to help Halladay in his battle with addiction, depression and anxiety. So did his wife. His closest friends. His parents and sisters. 



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