Hope is the thing with feathers… –
November 10, 2019 – “Hope” is the thing with feathers —That perches in the soul—And sings the tune without the words —And never stops — at all.”
—Emily Dickinson
I just finished Paula Becker’s powerful memoir “A House on Stilts: Mothering in the Age of Opioid Addiction.” It’s a gripping story of a mom living through her son’s drug addiction. She writes from her heart, with brutal honesty.
Hers is a beautifully written but painful story of how hope and fear can turn our souls inside out. Becker is a local author and her husband, Dr. Barry Brown, is a longtime physician at The Everett Clinic. Chemical dependency is an equal-opportunity condition — it doesn’t care if your parents are shoemakers, mechanics, engineers or doctors. Parents, like Paula and Barry, always look back and second-guess every decision — looking for the thief that stole their beloved child from them. They ruminate over every parental decision: “If only I hadn’t moved when Charlie was in the second grade.” “If only I had moved when Sarah was in the second grade.” “If only I had a less demanding job.” “If only I had a better job.” It’s a long list of “should haves” that haunt moms and dads. The causes of drug addiction are poorly understood and likely stem from many factors that are impossible to grasp. It’s a sad truth. I am a big believer in the healing power of Al-Anon, a 12-step program for families with an alcoholic or drug addict. I believe that, alone in this journey, we will drown. We need others to help us stay afloat. We need a community to help us find our way. We need a higher power, whatever that may mean to each of us.
