Someone You Know? –
October 18, 2019 – But if a friend or loved one’s behaviors change or they start to withdraw and you feel worried, “trust your gut,” says Dr. Christine Moutier of the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. “If they are talking about feeling trapped, like they’re a burden to others, overwhelmed, hopeless, desperate, in pain, any of those indicators, that is your cue to be able to say, ‘When you talk about that level of pain or desperation’ — use their words — ‘it makes me wonder if you’ve thought of ending your life.’” It’s a “complete fallacy” that asking someone the question plants the idea, says Vanessa McGann, chair of the Survivors of Suicide Loss Task Force at the American Association of Suicidology. “If you just ask the person directly, it’s a relief for them to be able to talk about it,” she says.
“You don’t have to solve the problem,” says John Draper, executive director of the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. “Just listening will help them feel less alone. Then they’ll feel less distressed, and you can connect them to additional resources.”
The nonprofit’s five steps for communicating with someone who may be suicidal: Ask, “are you thinking about suicide?”; Keep them safe by reducing their access to lethal means such as firearms; Be there for them, whether in person or any other way; Help them connect by offering to call or text a crisis line or accompany them if they are referred elsewhere; Stay in touch to offer ongoing support.
