AUDIO – IF YOU ONLY KNEW –
Sept. 10, 2024 – You bring the drinks over to our table and I sip my Heineken 00. Honestly, to me, it tastes just like the alcoholic version, not that I did drink Heineken when I was a booze hound. I was too busy throwing wine down my throat to bother trying anything else. You pick up your drink and take a large swig. ‘I needed that,’ you say. You didn’t, I don’t say. You just think you do.
Almost five years ago, I called last orders on all my hangovers, my early morning wakings, my self-recrimination and self-abuse. At that time, I didn’t really mean to stop forever. I didn’t think I could. But I did. A 30-day alcohol-free online program turned into a never-drinking-again life.
At first, I was almost apologetic when out with wine-loving friends.
‘You know the whole story of my dad’s drinking. All the trouble he caused. How mum wouldn’t leave him, so I ended up leaving Scotland. It’s all so emotional, all psychological. I just need to stop drinking myself to feel better about all that.’ (Photo: Seana Smith)
