YOU CAN’T RUN AWAY FROM YOURSELF –
July 26, 2024 – When marathons didn’t make me feel better, I decided I had to keep running. I started trail running, where there’s a huge drinking culture. In the evenings, there were social gatherings and I would go from one running club to another, drinking beer with them all until I was completely drunk.
I got the reputation as the runner who drank openly during the race. But I wasn’t entirely unique. Booze is a painkiller. Jagermeister was developed by the Norwegian military to help soldiers withstand physical pain and mentally prepare for battle. Many races reward you with a beer at the finish. It’s insane.
You would never drink so much that you trip or fall. Just enough to numb you a little. But as my tolerance increased, I could drink more and more during a race without it hurting my performance.
Eventually, I moved on to 100-mile ultra marathons. But no matter how far I ran or how many races I won, I still felt depressed. I knew I wasn’t addicted to running because I could stop whenever I wanted — if I got injured or exhausted, I could take a break.
But quitting alcohol was never an option. I remember flying to Thailand on a Russian airline that banned alcohol on the plane. I bought a liter of vodka in duty free and poured it into my water bottle so I could drink it during the flight. Not drinking, even for those few hours, just didn’t seem possible.
