Eating Disorder

The Never Ending Cycles of My Eating Disorder

IF YOU BAKE IT, THEY WILL COME –

Oct. 2023 – From as far back as I can remember food was difficult. Every time my family ate at a restaurant, it never failed. I barfed after every meal. “Alah, Ag sar sarwa manen.” Translation: She’s throwing up again. It was just expected. I walked to the bathroom, barfed, and returned. And we just carried on.
As an adult, food issues took a different turn. Instead of under-eating and being underweight, I swung the other direction. Each year, my clothing size would go up. I’d have to buy new clothes, but I saved small sizes as motivation. The weight would go up, then down, then up, down, and then way up.
I was binging all day and every night. It was as if I was making up for lost time from childhood. No matter what I ate I was still hungry and never felt satisfied, so I just moved on to the next food. I couldn’t even taste anything, because I was just thinking of what to eat next.

READ@InTheRooms

C Luke

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