12 Step Program

Jewel on Reconciling with “Abusive” Father After He Got Sober

Shining Brighter Than Ever –

November 19, 2020 – No longer willing to put up with the abuse, Jewel moved off her family’s homestead at age 15 and into a cabin of her own.  When she left home, Jewel, now 46, says she was determined not to hold a grudge against her father despite everything she had been through.

“I was determined to heal: to let go, move on and figure out how I could be the one who changed those habits,” she says.  Jewel credits the meditation and mindfulness practices — which she first started developing at age 18 while spending a year homeless after moving to San Diego to be with her mom — for helping her break the cycle.  “I ended up homeless because I wouldn’t have sex with a boss,” she says. “I started living in my car because my boss wouldn’t give me my paycheck. Then my car got stolen.”

With nowhere to turn but the streets, she shoplifted to get by.

“One day, I was shoving this dress down my baggy Levi 501 jeans and thought, ‘I’m going to end up in jail or dead,’” she says. “Then I remembered this quote by Buddha: ‘Happiness does not depend on what you have or who you are. It solely relies on what you think.’ I thought, maybe I could turn my life around one thought at a time.”

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Leonard Buschel

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