Brennan Ward: Addiction, Sobriety and Starting Over

AUDIO – IT’S HARD TO FIGHT YOUR WAY OUT OF A PLASTIC BAG –

Jan. 20, 2022 – The conversation went on for a while before it was time for another consultation. Ward was going through his lifelines. The next number he rang was a friend, the same one he got high with right before the 18-hour flight to Japan. His friend would know what to do.

“I can’t f*cking do this. I can’t f*cking do this,” Ward remembers saying.

“Send your guy out,” the voice on the other end of the call replied. “He’s got to go find some Vicodin or something.”

That’s really all Ward could do. His hands were tied. He didn’t know anyone outside of the select Americans chosen to represent Bellator overseas. So Google was his only option. Hmmm, where to begin? He tried typing in some keywords that would get him what he needed – his fix.

Ward was an exciting, world-class fighter. He was also a hardcore drug addict. Pills, cocaine, alcohol, heroin, you name it.

“I’m on the f*cking internet, bro. I’m searching like ‘drug use in Japan,’ ‘areas affected by drug use,’” Brennan said. “Like, I’m looking for places to send this motherf*cker to get me some f*cking something.”

No luck.

While most of the world prepared to ring in the New Year of 2016 the following evening, Ward was dope-sick. Not the “puking-sh*tting” kind of dope-sick, but the anxiety-ridden-and-fatigue symptoms of withdrawal. Mental struggles were traditionally worse for Ward, so it really sucked.